Being an artist can be a blessing and a curse, especially when your art becomes your job. When you build a business and make a living from something so personal from you. When you struggle to achieve your visions but still make your clientele happy. While there are four to five photographers on every street corner now days I have always felt a root deep into the art side of the medium. I realized a few weeks ago that I never had that cool, way back story that a lot of photographers do. The answer to the question “So, why did you get into photography?” was never “Oh, when I was six my grandfather gave me his old Nikon and I fell in love…” My answer is short a basic. I thought it was cool, I started playing around with it and I found my outlet. At a time in my life when I so badly needed and wanted an outlet, I found it.
a·vant-garde – noun
1.the advance group in any field, especially in the visual, literary, or musical arts, whose works are characterized chiefly by unorthodox and experimental methods.2.unorthodox or daring; radical.
A lot of people don’t know this but my photography history is a pretty dark one. I started out shooting film and only black and white. I had ideas to only photograph people with deep stories but along the way I realized we ALL have stories and they all deserve to be shared. Photography was my muse, though. I have always been rather introverted and it was a way for me to make sense of the things I saw in my mind and felt inside. I was able to bring them to life, show them to people I wanted and see that they were real. That my ideas were actually real and anything I could dream up was possible if I just stuck with it long enough. I was a black sheep and it let me feel at ease with what I felt and that ease saved me in so many ways.
Throughout the journey of making my photography a business though, I have lose a sense of self. I have gotten lost in what I see as topical, easy, normal, and “pretty”. I felt scared to reach in, reflect, and to bring those deeper visions to life. I was scared no one wanted to see them, no one shared these visions or was even interested in experimenting. I have recently found out just how wrong I was, though. All I had to was speak up, voice my ideas to people I trusted and who trusted me and just like that, my visions came to life.
So what’s the point of this post and why should you care? Well, I’m not saying you should, but I am saying that when given the reigns a little bit I can make your inside visions come true as well. Together, we can collaborate and make your photographs a piece of art. I had the chance to do just that twice this past week and when I look at these photos I think YES! This is exactly what I want to do! I want to tell stories with shadows, with mystery and with ideas dreamed up late at night. I want my work to speak for itself and I want to express myself (and you) with more than just a pretty picture! I am going to be taking my boudoir photography more in this direction not just for myself but for you. So you too don’t have to be afraid to express yourself and to step outside the box. I felt so liberated and like a weight was lifted off me when I was able to do these two shoots with real clients when all I had to do was raise my voice. They allowed me to raise my voice and I once again was reminded why I love photography as an art form. Why it is my muse. Why this is what I love to do.
In other news, I posted on my facebook page this afternoon 2 truths and 1 untruth about me and I asked everyone to guess which statement was NOT true. The statements were:
1 – I have a large scar on my forehead from being hit with a sea-saw but tell people it’s from a knife fight because well, it sounds much cooler.
2 – I own all of Garth Brooks’ Box Sets.
3 – I have watched every Harry Potter movie at least twice and cried at the end of the last one.
Most people guessed correctly – #3 is NOT true. In fact, I’ve never seen one Harry Potter movie. 
The first one is more of a joke but I do tell people with a smirk that I got in a knife fight. And without shame (Shameless, anyone?), I do own all of Garth Brooks’ box sets. Good job, guys!
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